Winter Coat

By Isaac AmendSeptember 12, 2026

In Moscow, everyone disappears in winter. By November the city is a procession of dark wool and fur-lined hoods. Bodies thicken into silhouettes. Shoulders square under padding. Necks vanish. You can’t tell who is soft, who is angular, who is young, who is older than they look. The cold flattens us into outlines. I bought my coat at a market near Belorusskaya Station: navy, calf-length, heavy enough to feel like armor. The vendor didn’t look at me twice. I paid in rubles and left before she could decide what I was. Underneath, my body was in negotiation. In the years to come I would take testosterone, seek stronger musculature, a deeper voice, and new identity. But for now my voice was still unsettled, hovering. My passport still bore a different name, a different marker, a different geometry of self. But in winter, none of that mattered. Winter did the work of passing for me. Layers are democratic. A sweater, a scarf, another sweater. Bulk erases contour. I learned to dress not for warmth but for ambiguity. I padded my hips with fabric. I flattened my chest with compression and then disguised the compression with wool. I stepped into the metro […]

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